20 Deal-Breakers in Dating

1. Doesn’t wear deodorant 

2.      Takes selfies (more than a normal amount)

3.       Orders an ice cream cone with sprinkles…sorry. So little boyish

4.       Was ever involved in a gang

5.       Listens to Jack Johnson

6.       If he asks you out on Facebook

7.       Wears short shorts (never really a need for that)

8.       Goes shirtless anywhere but the beach, near the beach, or when working outdoors

9.       If he straightens his hair regularly 

10.   Doesn’t order food when he offers to take you out for food. Like what’s your deal dude.

11.   If he brings up what he got on his SATs, without an appropriate segway to this topic in the conversation.

12.   If he has any interest what so ever in segways

13.   Drives recklessly

14.   Acts into every other attractive girl before you

15.   Never laughs or nervous laugher

16.   Pokes you on Facebook (worst)

17.   Comments on how much you eat

18.   Gossips. Save it for the ladies please.

19.   Wears a fedora

20.   Owns anything Gucci

“For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are Never Alone.”

I believe in self- reliance and being able to hold your head up high. I believe in caring and doing good for others to get good in return. I believe in second chances and benefit of the doubt. I believe true friends are real and when you find some, the friendship forms itself. I do not believe in being strung along, or trying to make something work that isn’t there.  I believe relationships work when give and take is granted without having to ask for it.

Lately I’ve been struggling with the amount of energy I spend thinking about others and how little they spend thinking about me. I know that as a “good-hearted” human being it’s not about what we get in return but after awhile caring with no retaliation gets tiresome.

This has been a reoccurring theme in my life for the past couple weeks.  Being so far away from home, I’ve learned that I can rely on myself and this is reassuring for future endeavors. However being the only one you can truly rely on can be frustrating.

Tonight, I thought for a minute after I was faced with a group of people I thought were suppose to be there for me… but rarely are.  I thought about the anger I felt towards them, and about what I’d say to them if I ever got the chance to tell them off. Then I thought about the people I would call to vent and I realized that the care I put out towards others,  is not wasted. I get it back through the consideration of my friends and family, both of which I would not replace with anyone else.

I don’t have a lot of friends but the friends I do have mean the world to me. They are people that took the time to get to know me and because of that I feel  like my complete self around them. Friends like that are hard to find.

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  • This boy (I am pointing to) is my best friend and has made me almost pee my pants laughing too many times to count. 
  • This girl never forgets to give me a card for every holiday/birthday. She is so thoughtful. 

 

 

  • I nicknamed this boy Hermburglar and we were magic ever since. We are miles apart but he always makes time to schedule a phone date. 

 

 

 

 

  • The newest person to join my clan of people I love being around. This boy is one of the most kindest, out-going people I’ve ever met. 

 

 

 

  • This girl is my long lost twin. We are always on the same wavelength. 

 

 

 

 

 

  • This boy will forever be my driving role model. He drove 4 hours on unknown roads to visit me one summer. 

 

 

 

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  • This girl is always positive and cheerful. She is always laughing about something. 

My advice: Keep caring, keep doing, keep being you because those who don’t appreciate it will envy your relationships
eventually. 

Lovely Love

Let me start with an excerpt from the movie Sixteen Candles, it is the dialogue between Samantha and her Father about her crush (If you have never seen the movie, Ginny is her older, beautiful sister who is about to get married)

Father: “That’s why they call them crushes if they were easy, they’d call ’em something else.”

Samantha: [Sighs] But if I were Ginny,

I’d have this guy crawling on his knees.”

Father: Well, let me tell you something about Ginny.

Now, I love her as much as I love you. But she’s a different person.

Sometimes I worry about her.

When you’re given things kind of easily, you don’t always appreciate them.

With you, I’m not worried.When it happens to you, Samantha, it’ll be forever.”heart

I loved this part of the movie because like Samantha, I don’t have very much luck when it comes to dating. I’ve been on a few too many dates and I rarely strike gold. A psychic told me once, that I am ‘picky’ when it comes to guys. I agree with her, but I don’t really consider it a bad thing. I am looking for a spark. I want to feel something for a guy and know he feels the same way. I don’t have time to lollygag with someone who does not interest me in the slightest.

I love the idea of love, but I often doubt it. I wonder if true love is a real thing, and if so why does it rarely last? But I think I may have answered that for myself.

My advice:  Love can’t be rushed. When you feel it, I think you will know it. 

Check out with link: Dakota Fanning- Dating views

In with the new, out with the old

New Years is never really a big deal for me but this year feels different. This year I am sad to see 2012 go because it was a good year but I am also excited to see where 2013 takes me!

New Year’s Resolution: to blog/ journal more!

Blogging has really helped me as a person. Keeping this blog has made me really see things rather than just looking at them. With Cancer as my horoscope, we are said to either dwell in the past or harp on the future, we have trouble living in the now. Bohobrain reminds me in different places and situations, to stop and see the beauty of the moment, rather than later from my memory. Journaling creates a space, where I can hold on to my thoughts, in addition to keeping me forever thankful.

My advice: Start a journal. I keep a small journal that holds one sentence everyday for 5 years.

When venturing out of your comfort zone, you never know what you’ll find.

For me, I am learning how to trust. Sometimes being so far away from everything I’ve ever known, I feel stranded. What I find interesting, is that with this feeling I am not scared, I am calm. There is an underlying sense that everything is going to be ‘ok’, because it has to be. With the distance between me and familiarity, I understand that I cannot control things. As much as I’d like to mold everything that happens in my life, I can’t. All I can do is hope that some force greater than myself will sculpt something beautiful for me, my life, and everyone I care about.

My advice: Don’t try to control anything, nothing can be controlled. We do not have that power. Life is different, when we stop controlling.

 

“What we think we become” -Buddha

Hopefully I am not the only college student who was too cheap and lazy to buy a TV and resorted to Netflix’s instead.

Netflix’s + the show Arrested Development = a lot of laughter…and one episode plot that got all philosophical on me.

The theme of the episode revolved around the idea that we cannot change who we are. With all the inspirational quotes on change, I never really stopped to think that our core beings are usually pretty concrete. Changing minor things to improve ourselves is one thing, but trying to be completely different, is denying our sense of self. Performing a personality overhaul on ourselves turns the changing, into hiding. The process of finding yourself is not evolving into someone all shiny and new, but finding what makes you, you and embracing it.



 

My Advice: Don’t conform to what everyone else is doing, do what makes you feel alive and admire yourself for that. Once you find it, enjoy the freedom of being nobody but yourself.

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The majority of my who I am has been built by what others have made me think I am.  This is not to say that most of those things are wrong, I would just like to find out for myself.  Up until recently, I put so much stock into people I classified as having it it all. I would hope that someday everything would fit together for me and I would be flawless like how I perceived other people. I realize now that these types of people appear perfect because they believe in themselves and are not afraid to show that.

 Finding the correct weight on the scale between what you give off and who you really are is to me one of life’s main challenges.  Diane Von Furstenberg once said, “When a woman becomes her own best friend life is easier.”

My advice: Treasure yourself before others, so that they will value you the same way you do.